Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
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