the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
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