I don't think brook has ever known best
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
