The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
