someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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