508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
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