Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I just threw up on my dentist
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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