I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Randomize