Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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