Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
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