And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
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