you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
