You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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