I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Randomize
