The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
