How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
