Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
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