yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I am midnight drunk by noon
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
