doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
don't judge my taste in strippers
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Randomize
