i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize