i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Keanu Reeves Photobombed A Couple’s Wedding Photos As A Perfect Gift
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
29 Married People Share What They Used To Find Cute About Their SO—But Now Find Infuriating
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers