Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
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