Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Randomize
