I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
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Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
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Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
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