I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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