did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Randomize
