Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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