I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
