no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
Randomize