Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
