Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Randomize
