are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
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