Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
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