I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
