how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
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