i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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