it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
