I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That accounts for only three of the penises
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize