Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
