new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I lost the right to judge tonight
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
