So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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