you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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