I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
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