You don't have asthma, your pregnant
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
