i think i have two assholes
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
