I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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