A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
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