the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I booty called her while she was in labor.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize