When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
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I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
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Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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