Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Randomize